2013

I usually feel obligated to post something on New Year's Eve, but I usually do it through facebook rather than this blog. I rarely do anything through this blog anymore... but it's a little past 2 am on New Year's Eve of 2013, and I can't sleep yet... what better time to reflect on the ups and downs of the past year, to dream about what 2014 might hold and to make a few foolish resolutions that will probably be broken in a matter of days than now? ;)


2013 has been filled with ups and downs... if I'm honest with myself, there are probably more ups than downs, really. I can't even think of any crappy moments right now, I'm so overwhelmed thinking about the wonderful ones! Top moments include singing at Vice President Biden's Christmas party, performing in my first college production ("The Pajama Game" with Montgomery College Summer Dinner Theatre), the first time I confided in my at-school "dad" (and all of the subsequent times with him), starting the Beauty in You Campaign (which you can visit on facebook or my photography website!), finding out my best friend is pregnant again, the last Christmas concert with my class, moving into my new apartment with my dear friend and roommate Kate, celebrating my best friend's 21st birthday, the March for Life, all the time I've spent at the Towne Taverne or Bull Run with Janny and Celina, celebrating my 21st birthday with my dear Madame, seeing Great Big Sea in concert, getting my first professional headshots done, the moments spent rocking Miss Coraline Brock to sleep, finding my attitude in dance class and making Shawn's picture wall, taking tons of pictures for my amazing friends and family, being bridesmaid for my childhood best friend as she married her Prince Charming, seeing four of my dearest friends tie the knot, time spent at San Antonio's with some of the MT '14 gang, time spent assistant directing "The Drowsy Chaperone," and passing my last undergraduate music theory class!

Of course, all the times I've spent with my family and my dear friends who might as well be family were the backbone of my year. There are all of the board games I've played with Dad and the boys, all of the shopping Mom and I have done together. There are all of the photo shoots and wonderful times spent just hanging out with my best friend Sarah, and the hugs and kisses from Ricky. There are the times I've spent with all four of my ladies: Madame, Debbie, Alicia, and Janny. Most recently I've been spending quite a bit of time with Jan... and somehow I haven't driven her completely crazy yet! Lol. I've grown closer to some old friends (Jenn), let go of some old grudges (Katie), and forged new relationships (Nicki). I've spent tons of time with James and Hannah just being crazy, and time with Kenzie watching old musicals and eating Chinese together.

I've spend more time that I like being down and depressed for no good reason. I've wasted a lot of tears on foolish things or people; I've cried honestly about things I can't help but wish I could. I've gotten angry over nothing. But I've gotten some better. And looking back through diary entries and facebook posts/messages, it is beyond clear to me that even when I've felt most alone, I've been surrounded by people who love me; all I have to do is pick up the phone and send a text or make a phone call. They're there for me, I just need to get away from myself enough to realize that.

Which brings me to my hopes for 2014. Fourteen goals/hopes/non-resolutions for the New Year:

1. Make a point of contacting all of the important people in my life at least once a week, including my family, my bestie, and my ladies. I can't complain about staying in touch if I don't make a concerted effort to stay in touch with them. On that note, make sure they know what they mean to me; any conversation could be the last.

2. Finish a novel, preferably either Khasa, Uncommon Soldier, Histoire d'Amour, or one of the Chloe MacPherson novels (but any novel will do!).

3. Avoid falling into depression and selfishness by focusing on the people in my life, rather than the people that are missing from it.

4. Do everything possible for a healthier, happier Jade... like cutting out processed foods again and running or swimming on my days off from dance class.

5. Be a better example for my cousins and my sweet "nephews," Ricky and Shain... in everything; live my life like I'd want them to live theirs.

6. Finish enough music for a cd release.

7. Get rid of the extra stuff in my life... like the books and shoes and whatnot that I never use.

8. Audition for more shows and perform in my first professional theatrical production.

9. Stop skipping class and avoiding homework. Even though I can't possibly make Dean's list at this point, I can still do a heck of a lot better than I have been.

10. Try to live up to the cross around my neck, in every possible way.

11. Make official plans to leave the country for the first time. Get that passport and get ready to go... then do it.

12. Party a little more. Freak out a little less. I'm 22 and single... there's no reason to spend every Friday night in my apartment.

13. Stop being afraid of the dating scene. Go on at least three dates by 2015... that's a liberal estimate considering my track record at this point! ;)

14. Be a more beautiful, happier, more confident Jade by 2015. Know what's happening next and be okay with it... whether that's DC, Mifflinburg, New York, California, France, Canada... pray for the possibilities throughout this year, and graduate knowing the basic logistics of what is coming next.




It's a tall order. And I'm sure I won't remember half of them... plus I'm notoriously bad at actually reaching goals like these. But they're worth the long shot, all of them.

Tomorrow when I finally crawl out of bed (today, rather), I'm cleaning out the car and then taking my camera on an adventure. We're visiting all of my haunts here in Mifflinburg and the surrounding areas... by the end of the day I will have a black and white photolog of this incredible place to take with me. I don't know what's happening in my life; I don't know where I'm going or what I'm doing. But I know how much my home means to me... and I know that will never slip away.

Until I write again, happy New Year. May your 2014 be abundantly blessed, and may you keep your resolutions this time around. ;)