Monday, January 23, 2012
Life Goes On
Wednesday, January 18, 2012
When Life Gives You the Middle Finger....
The last month and a half of my life has been half-Hell, half-Heaven. I suppose I'm in Purgatory. I'm not sure exactly why I'm being punished, although I could take some good guesses. I'm a good girl. Sometimes. And I'm trying to be better.
Anyway, you know Peter, the love of my life, my soldier boy who I was going to spend the rest of my life with and be happy with forever? Well, he dumped me in December. Three weeks away from getting engaged, ring and all, we had registries and everything, and he turned tail and ran. Said he "couldn't do it anymore," that he "had nothing left to give." While I personally think that's a load of bull, I had no choice in the matter. He is gone... and this time, I don't think he's coming back. We've talked some since then, but I get accused of being crazy and attacking him, and now he has unfriended me and is ignoring me. It's killing me. Every night I go to bed and I can just feel his arms around me. I dream about us, about our relationship, about our future... and then I wake up and realize that everything I loved and believed in was a lie. This has been the Hell part of the past month and a half. I would do anything to get him back. Anything to be happy and in love again, to put this behind us, get married, and be together forever. But I must have done some pretty bad crap and be in the lowest level of Purgatory, because even though the desire is there, my anger and hurt has gotten in the way and destroyed pretty much any hope there ever was that we would get back together. Have I attacked? Yes. Have I said hurtful things? Yes. I called him a coward. And a child. And honestly, running away from your commitments just because you're going through a rough time is cowardly. It's what Glenda and Grammy and everybody like that did. It's what I've done and sworn I would never do again. But I didn't need to say it so brutally... or so frequently. I want him in my arms again.
There has been a (sorta) bright side to this. That being that I've been home for over a month, the longest I've been home since I left for college in August of 2010. I'm living with my parents, taking a semester off of college, and rediscovering some of the best relationships of my life, relationships that never really went anywhere but faded into the background a little bit. The most prominent of these (besides my family - my brothers and I get along better now than we have in years) are Miss Alicia, Madame, Jess, and Sarah (Haines) Smith. I've started dancing with Miss Alicia again, and I've discovered that I'm at my best and my happiest when I'm focusing nonstop on beating my body into dancing shape. But more than that, when I'm at the studio and with Miss Alicia, the conversation picks up like I never went anywhere. She doesn't judge me, she understands needing to reroute your life when stuff like this happens. She supports me, and I don't know what I'd do without her on my side right now. Madame is another great lady and amazing friend who has made this a billion times easier. We've spent a good deal of time together in the past three weeks, and she is full of wisdom and support. She doesn't judge me either, she is supporting me, helping me look for a job, when she sees I'm upset, she does crazy things to help make it better. Her smile is infectious, and I can't help feeling happier when I'm around her. I swear she's an angel.
The other two are Jessie (and her adorable baby, my nephew Aiden!) and Sarah. Two of my friends who didn't go off to college, they're around and just as bored as I am most of the time, haha, and so we've spent a lot of time together too. I wonder why I never bothered to spend more time with them before... I regret that to a degree, but I also think we probably couldn't have been as close then. We would've killed each other! I was too much of a drama queen (I know, I still am... believe it or not, I've done my best to get rid of a lot of drama)... it would've driven them nuts.
So that's life. I miss Peter more than I can possibly say. I want to scream and cry and hit him and hold him and kiss him and love him all at the same time. I'm dancing and singing here at home, looking for a job (if you know of any nearby, PLEASE let me know!), fostering some very deep friendships that have needed fostering for awhile, and hoping and praying I'll make enough money to go to France in the spring.
Oh, yeah! France! I'm trying to get in with a program to be a live-in English tutor in France for two months. It's in a little city called Montpellier on the Mediterranean, and it would be the perfect job for me! So we'll see what happens.
The other thing that's been happening is (despite the title and volatile nature of most of this post) is that I've been doing my best to get closer to God. Going to mass every Sunday instead of making excuses (yes, I confessed it). Singing in mass sometimes, going to Great Adventure again, doing devotions every day, and in general, doing my best to grow as close to the heart of God as possible. I know he has a plan for me, and as much as this hurts right now, eventually I'll understand why, and something good will come of it. Maybe it will be something as simple - and crucial - as a closer walk with God. Maybe God brought Peter and me together so he could help me make the decision to be Catholic. Maybe more. The one thing I know for certain is that this is not the end of the road for me, and as much as it feels like it won't sometimes, the sun will still rise in the morning, and tomorrow will be another day. If tomorrow is crappy, well, the sun will set again and rise the next morning, giving me another chance to be better still. And so it goes. With God's strength, I will prevail.
Sunday, October 02, 2011
Family Ties (Warning - May Get Cocky and -ahem- Biological)
Go ahead, try to convince me. I suppose I am, to a degree, an anti-feminist. I'm fully aware that I am just as good as those members of society with penises, but obviously, I'm not one of them! I was made to do something different. Now, I'm nineteen years old, okay? I'm not an aged, wizened old woman trying to reach the world and keep things from changing... I'm part woman, part kid who is trying to figure out what on earth is going on with this crappy world. But I'm pretty sure that I wasn't made to deny my instincts, to turn away from what my heart obviously craves and desires, even needs. Fifty years ago, if a young woman my age thought the way I do... well, she's be idolized by every older relative she had, and they'd be so proud of their mature young woman, off to marry and raise a family of her own, playing her role in society. Today? Not the case. Today, everyone apparently knows better than to waste precious time on a spouse and children, everyone knows that the most important thing in life is to get a degree and work until you die, discovering "yourself" and denying that billions of children are being raised by daycares, or in two different households at the same time, never knowing where they'll be thrown next.
Everyone tells me I'm too young, I'm not mature enough. Well, let me tell you something. I'm not always mature, I can admit that easily. But go spend an hour or two at the grocery store. Observe people at a park. I would put money on the fact that you'll find some mother screaming at her child because the child is misbehaving and perhaps the mother is feeling some immaturity and just can't handle it. She could be forty years old. You can go sit on a bench on a city street, you'll see adults flicking each other off when one idiotic city driver pulls out in front of another. You'll see grown people walk past homeless people - the ones that, when you've lived around them long enough, you can tell are real and not just out for drug money - and you can watch a college student slip a bill or two to them, or even pull them up and buy them dinner. Who is more mature, the investment banker who walked past the homeless man with a sneer on his face, or the college kid who picked him up and dusted him off? Who is more mature, the Wall Street mother who leaves her kid alone to throw temper tantrums because they're alone and toys can only do so much, or the nanny who shows that kid what it's like to be loved?
Now, I'm not knocking people who have higher-up jobs, I'm just trying to make a point. If you spend your life devoted to your money, to the way you think society wants you to be, you'll end up with a pile of anguish and regret. I don't want that. I will have regrets, I know that. Because let me tell you something, it is impossible to live life without one single regret. I have a ton already, at nineteen. But falling in love and planning to spend the rest of my life with the most amazing person I have ever met is not one of them. Going to college for a degree that might not come to fruition the way I expect, but that makes me happy and gives me a place to be me? Definitely not a regret. Trying to live my life the way I think it should be lived? Not a regret.
I'm not saying I'm perfect. Writing a blog about others' maturity levels... probably not my most mature moment. But I can't shake the feeling that no matter what I do, I'm never going to measure up to society, and if this is what I'm being compared to... then I don't WANT to measure up. I want to go about my life, doing my best to live what God's set out for me. If that means getting married at 22... bring it, baby! If that means I don't hit Broadway... well, yes, that will be a bitter pill to swallow, but I'll bet God will make it worthwhile if I let Him. See, the thing is, everybody seems to think that one thing or another will make them happy, will keep them from ever being miserable again. "If I make enough money," "If I get liposuction one more time," "If I put off having kids until AFTER I have a career...."
Stop criticizing me. Stop telling me I'm making the wrong decisions. I'm not doing drugs, I'm not drinking away my weekends like 3/4 of the college students that you (by some freaky twist of fate) are actually proud of. I'm not spending my whole life striving for something I'll never reach, because I know that I can reach what I'm meant to. Stop telling me I'm living my life wrong. It's not that I'm living it "wrong," I'm just not living it your way. But it isn't yours to live, end of story. If it was, my name wouldn't be Jade. It would be something else.
And you know what? To all of my dear friends out there who have decided that climbing the corporate ladder isn't for you: good for you. One of the sweetest, happiest, most God-like women that I know is a stay-at-home mom with four kids who couldn't be happier and more content. And I strive to be like her. I strive to be like my mom, who opened her shop to fulfill one of her dreams, and who still puts her kids first. I strive to be like Madame, who goes absolutely crazy running around doing stuff for other people, who is always there when I need someone.
When I'm forty, fifty years old, I don't want to look back with regrets. So guess what... I'm not going to sit here and deliberately create them for myself. And if I slow down, if I wait, if I "get my education," "have my career first," I'm going to do just that, and I refuse. Enjoy your life and your career. I will love having my family and waking up every day excited to see where it might take me.
Tuesday, September 20, 2011
Catching Up
So, here's a little recap of what's happened since I last wrote:
- I finished my freshman year with a 3.65 GPA, which led to me being invited into Phi something something... the freshmen honor society. :) I have accepted, the initiation ceremony is late in October!
- I stayed in D.C. over the summer and took a World Religions class, which I loved, and worked... which I loved not quite so much. I worked at L'Occitane, a French skincare boutique, which was really cool, and met some neat people, but as things got crazier and crazier, I realized there was no way I could possibly do work (with an hour and a half commute both ways) and 20 credits of classes at the same time, it probably would have killed me. So here I am, once again gainfully unemployed (well, I have work study, but nothing else) and going nuts with 20 music school credits - which are, by the way, totally different from regular credits. You'd think a one credit course would result in one hour of class per week, right? Not so in a conservatory setting. My dance classes are one credit each, and I have two of them... I dance five hours a week. Yep.
- I managed to complete and pay for an entire degree. I have my certification in Bridal Consulting. I'm not really planning to go crazy starting a business right now, but would love to gain experience, so if you plan to get married in either the DC or Central PA areas, please feel free to contact me! For a limited time (aka until I graduate and move away), I'm going to be doing virtually free bridal consulting. I may charge a small fee, but it'll be at about 1/10 the price you'd usually be charged.
- Speaking of things I charge for... I'm also doing photography! Same general idea, I'm not charging a ton ($15/hr plus travel expenses), not really opening a full-blown business, just something I love doing and I'm somewhat good at. I have a website (www.jadearwenphotography.webs.com), and you can also like my facebook page (https://www.facebook.com/pages/Jade-Arwen-Photography/185692428131369). I did a wedding this summer and have another one in November, and I'm super excited about it!
- Peter and I are amazing. I love him way more than I ever thought I would, and I can't wait to see where life takes us!
- I've gotten to a point where what people think doesn't really matter... because those of you who really know me realize that I'm not a crazy psycho-b****. And those who think I am really should get to know me a little better! At least before you go around spreading stuff and making life difficult for me.
Umm... I think that may be about it! Lol, I'm sure I'll come up with more. I made the advanced choir and passed my French interview, allowing me to access the top levels, which is great, but proving to be quite the challenge! That's life for now... let's see if I can get back into this whole blogging thing. ;)
Wednesday, December 22, 2010
Monday, December 13, 2010
Monday, November 29, 2010
Thursday, October 14, 2010
Ramblings
Monday, October 11, 2010
My Dear Followers (of whom I'm not sure there are very many):
Monday, August 30, 2010
First Day of Classes!!
Today is my first day of classes. I've barely had a minute to myself to write much of anything before now due to the crazy orientation stuffs here at CUA, so I thought I'd try to get a few words in before my 9am theory class this morning....
I absolutely adore CUA. It is breathtakingly beautiful (yes, I will post pictures... perhaps a photoshoot with Risa today? Or Laura? That would be fun!), has all the appearances and comforts of living in the country - I've even got those stupid cicadas outside my window - but all the convenience of a major metropolis right in my grasp. DC is a beautiful city too... and I already found a Payless. ;) Most of the buildings are absolutely beautiful. The Basilica takes your breath away... you don't have to be Catholic to revel in the magnificence of the church (although it becomes even more incredible when you understand the significance behind everything). The other main buildings are all super old-world looking, as though we were in eighteenth century London rather than modern DC. They're the typical rough stone, glorious towers and spirals... it's like have class in a bunch of mini castles. The buildings that aren't built like that are mainly the residence halls, which are brick... but that's okay, we forgive them. The other building that isn't stone is the Pryz, which is basically the student lounge/dining hall. The Pryz is incredibly modern, made almost entirely of glass windows on the open sides, which is really amazing.
There are lots of lawns and open areas, a Marian garden that is simple but beautiful, and a huge sports complex (Devante, I thought you might like that piece of information). All in all, CUA is, well, amazing. :D
I have a few people I've made friends with here, mostly musical theatre people. There's Risa, Laura, James... and Anna my roommate, although we really don't hang out, we just kinda live together, lol. So yeah... that's about it for now, I guess. Any questions, post 'em! I'm headed off to class soon. On the schedule for today: Music Theory (fml) at 9, Theatre I at 10, Women's Chorus at noon, and French at 1. After that, I'm actually free today... might go to Tenley for a USB cord at Best Buy, lol.
Tata for now!
Jade
Tuesday, August 24, 2010
Farewell, Little Town....
Farewell, little town,
I'll miss you dearly.
I may not miss the repugnant smell
Of manure on the hottest days of all,
Or driving behind tractors
Who don't drive but crawl,
But your laughs and smiles,
Your beauty in the fall...
Yes, these I will miss,
For you've served me well.
Farewell, little town,
Not for good,
But for all.
Farewell, sweet town,
I'll not forget you yet.
How could I forget
The sweet smell of the rain,
Or when the stars sparkle
'Through a night and not in vain.
I won't forget a thing,
My homeplace and my birth,
For it was here I became myself
With sorrow and with mirth.
Farewell, little town.
Farewell, my town,
I must now bid you adieu.
I'll return, and surely soon,
But me you'll not be able to woo.
I'm going away,
I'm flying high,
But little town,
You'll always be in the back of my mind.
You hold my heart and my every dream,
My life, my love, my every scream.
You keep my secrets and hold my fears,
But I must go,
And 'through the years
Must grow and find
And new little place,
But you, sweet little town,
I will not disgrace.
I love you all,
My hope and my joys,
My fears, my dreams,
And all destroyed.
My home is here,
And will always be,
But I must flee, little town,
I must go find me.
Farewell, little town. <3